After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one. - Cato the Elder
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He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death. - H.H. Munro (Saki)
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I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. - Sir Winston Churchill
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I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. - Ian Fleming
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Only the young die good. - Cynic's Calendar
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I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying. - Woody Allen
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When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite. - Sir Winston Churchill
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Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. - Isaac Asimov
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I'll sleep when I'm dead. - Warren Zevon
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Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours. - Yogi Berra
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Our birth is nothing but our death begun, As tapers waste the moment they take fire. - Edward Young
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Dying is easy. Comedy is difficult. - Edmund Gwenn
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Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. - W. Somerset Maugham
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Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. - Redd Foxx
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Death will be a great relief. No more interviews. - Katherine Hepburn
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Certainty? In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes. - Benjamin Franklin
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To save your world you asked this man to die;
Would this man, could he see you now, ask why? - W. H. Auden
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But life is sweet, though all that makes it sweet. Lessen like sound of friends departing feet; And death is beautiful as feet of friend. Coming with welcome at our journey's end. - James Russell Lowell
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Death does determine life. Once life is finished it acquires a sense; up to that point it has not got a sense; its sense is suspended and therefore ambiguous. However, to be sincere I must add that for me death is important only if it is not justified and rationalized by reason. For me death is the maximum of epicness and death. - Pier Paolo Pasolini
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There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana
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In the long run we are all dead. - John Maynard Keynes
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Richard doesn't really like me to kill bugs, but sometimes I can't help it. - Cindy Crawford
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Was Uncle Oscar's death very untimely, you ask? Well, it was near lunch. - Archie Bunker - Carroll O'Connor
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For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson
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I don't believe in dying. It's been done. I'm working on a new exit. Besides, I can't die now— I'm booked. I can't afford to die— I'd lose too much money. - George Burns
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According to the L.A. Times, Attorney General John Ashcroft wants to take "a harder stance" on the death penalty. What's a harder stance on the death penalty? We're already killing the guy? How do you take a harder stance on the death penalty? What, are you going to tickle him first? Give him itching powder? Put a thumbtack on the electric chair. - Jay Leno
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They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days. - Garrison Keillor
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To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness. (The Importance of Being Earnest, 1895) - Oscar Wilde
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The report of my death was an exaggeration. (New York Journal, June 1897) - Mark Twain
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No one can confidently say that he will still be living tomorrow.
- Euripides
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I too shall lie in the dust when I am dead, but now let me win noble renown. (The Iliad) - Homer
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It is entirely seemly for a young man killed in battle to lie mangled by the bronze spear. In his death all things appear fair. But when dogs shame the gray head and gray chin and nakedness of an old man killed, it is the most piteous thing that happens among wretched mortals. (The Iliad) - Homer
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Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides.
- Lao Tzu
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Has this world been so kind to you that you should leave with regret? There are better things ahead than any we leave behind. - C. S. Lewis
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It is hard to have patience with people who say "There is no death" or "Death doesn't matter." There is death. And whatever is matters. And whatever happens has consequences, and it and they are irrevocable and irreversible. You might as well say that birth doesn't matter. - C. S. Lewis
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Whenever death may surprise us, let it be welcome if our battle cry has reached even one receptive ear and another hand reaches out to take up our arms.
- Ernesto Che Guevara
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A tomb now suffices him for whom the whole world was not sufficient. - Alexander The Great
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Everybody has got to die but I have always believed an exception would be made in my case. - William Saroyan
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If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button. - Sam Levenson
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My father died of cancer when I was a teenager. He had it before it became popular. - Goodman Ace
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I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens. - Woody Allen
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I have nothing against undertakers personally. It's just that I wouldn't want one to bury my sister. - Jessica Mitford
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I can't die. It would ruin my image. - Jack LaLanne
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A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy. - Jerry Seinfield
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If this is dying, then I don't think much of it. - Lytton Strachey
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When I die, I hope they don't cremate me 'cuz I'll burn forever. - Harry Caray
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Death solves all problems - no man, no problem. - Joseph Stalin
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The death of one man is a tragedy. The death of millions is a statistic.
- Joseph Stalin
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Achieving life is not the equivalent of avoiding death. - Ayn Rand
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'Dying for an idea,' again, sounds well enough, but why not let the idea die instead of you? - Wyndham Lewis
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Had we lived, I should have had a tale to tell of the hardihood, endurance, and courage of my companions which would have stirred the heart of every Englishman. These rough notes and our dead bodies must tell the tale. - Robert Falcon Scott
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He makes a very handsome corpse and becomes his coffin prodigiously. - Oliver Goldsmith
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Death, the one appointment we all must keep, and for which no time is set. - Earl Derr Biggers
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I don't feel good. (last words) - Luther Burbank
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The best of men cannot suspend their fate:
The good die early, and the bad die late. - Daniel DeFoe
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Hovering between wife and death. (on his deathbed, asked how he was) - James Montgomery
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I'll never die. I'll just explode, right there before your eyes, onstage. - Dick Dale
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Every man is born as many men and dies as a single one. - Martin Heidegger
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Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him. (last words) - John Barrymore
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This is no time for making new enemies. (when asked on his deathbed to renounce Satan) - Voltaire
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No one's death comes to pass without making some impression, and those close to the deceased inherit part of the liberated soul and become richer in their humaneness. - Hermann Broch
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If one permits an infidel to continue in his role as a corrupter of the earth, his moral suffering will be all the worse. If one kills the infidel, and this stops him from perpetrating his misdeeds, his death will be a blessing to him. - Ruhollah Khomeini
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You know, I don't mind dying. The thing that pisses me off is that I won't get to be an old man. I was looking forward to that. - Robert Lansing
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We sometimes congratulate ourselves at the moment of waking from a troubled dream; it may be so the moment after death. - Nathaniel Hawthorne
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It proves what they always say: give the public what they want and they'll come out for it. (on Harry Cohn's funeral) - Red Skelton
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I desire that death find me ready and writing, or if it please Christ, praying and in tears. - Francesco Petrarch
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The closer we come to the negative, to death, the more we blossom. - Montgomery Clift
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Fear not that thy life shall come to an end, but rather that it shall never have a beginning. - John Henry Cardinal Newman
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A man's dying is more the survivors' affair than his own. - Thomas Mann
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A belief in hell and the knowledge that every ambition is doomed to frustration at the hands of a skeleton have never prevented the majority of human beings from behaving as though death were no more than an unfounded rumor. - Aldous Huxley
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In Spain, the dead are more alive than the dead of any other country in the world. - Federico Garcia Lorca
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Madam, Life's a piece in bloom
Death goes dogging everywhere:
She's the tenant of the room
He's the ruffian on the stair. - William Henley
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I want to die like my father, peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and terrified, like his passengers. - Bob Monkhouse
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Arthur hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realised there was a contradiction there and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife. - Douglas Adams
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It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune. - Woody Allen
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On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down. - Woody Allen
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Death is just life's next big adventure.
- J. K. Rowling
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Dying of tuberculosis: The earth is suffocating... Swear to make them cut me open, so that I won't be buried alive. - Frederic Chopin
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This is the big one! You hear that, Elizabeth? I'm coming to join ya, honey! - Redd Foxx
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Dying is the most embarrassing thing that can ever happen to you, because someone's got to take care of all your details. - Andy Warhol
